Duck Law No. 1
If it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, looks like a duck and cooks like a duck, it's a duck.
Restatement: All things are known by their attributes.

Duck Law No. 2
Even under ideal circumstances, no duck, no matter how noble or well-intentioned, can be an eagle.
Restatement: All things must be what they are.

Duck Law No. 3
A duck can pretend to be an eagle except in times of adversity.
Restatement: Pretense and adversity are inversely proportional; adversity reveals the true nature of all things.

Duck Law No 4
No duck may be an eagle until it abandons its webbed feet and bill for talons and a beak.
Restatement: All things remain as they are until the attributes that define them are abandoned. Then, and only then, can they evolve.

Duck Law No. 5
Ducks are noble creatures. They shall not be penalized in the eyes of other creatures because they are not eagles.
Restatement: All things are honorable if they are what they are honestly, even if they are different from you.

Duck Law No. 6
The greatest duck that ever was cannot fly as high as even a modest eagle.
Restatement: If one would soar with eagles, do not swim with ducks.

Duck Law No. 7
Ducks flock. Eagles fly alone. Ducks and eagles never mingle.
Restatement: Choose company wisely.

Duck Law No. 8
A duck's quack doesn't echo. No one knows why.
Restatement: Sometimes there is no answer.